Rankings – Worst and Best MBTA Train Lines

So I was having a conversation with one of my friends about Marty McFly’s Nike sneakers from the future and if they were really real how they would rival the Jordans for the best sneakers to wear.  Then my friend tells me that he’s on the green line and he absolutely hates how the seating on it is and he can’t stand the divider that they have on the green line. (you know the part where you stand on and it feels like the train is going to spin you around.)  Clearly my friend is out of his fuckin mind if he thinks the green line is the worst of the train lines, just a ridiculous statement to even make.  After hearing that I got to thinking about what are the worst and best train lines in Boston and what makes them what they are.

5 being ranked the worst and 1 being the best.

5. The Orange Line – Being on the Orange Line is like being in a Spike Lee film, you know something intense is going to go down and somebody is going to be giving you the mean muggin face for a while.  Try to avoid being on this train after 5 p.m. and the only stops you should really care about is from Back Bay-North Station(Celtics,Bruins,Green Line Connection and about a 1 min walk to the bars).

4. The Blue Line – Charles MGH, Aquarium, Airport, and Suffolk Downs is the only thing that this line is good for.  I honestly have no idea how to walk or drive to the Aquarium and I’ve been there or at least in that area so many times.  Also Mon-Wed-Sat I think is another time that the Blue Line deems itself useful for taking trips to Suffolk Downs to head over and try to win some money on a couple of races.  Hopefully you can win some money so the train ride back home can be somewhat enjoyable since the scenery outside the window always looks like the neighborhood has been bombed.

3. The Red Line – I actually have no beef with this line at all.  This might be the fastest out of all the lines and takes you to a reasonable amount of locations throughout Boston.  Simple to figure out how to get around and it also provides you with some decent live music during the weekend nights while your waiting to go along your way….yes I said some decent music.

2. Commuter Rail/Purple Line – Best. Seats. Ever!  Doesn’t matter what time it is but once I get on the Commuter Rail and I sit in one of those soft leather seats I’m passing the fuck out quicker than Courtney Love in an Arby’s bathroom.  Everybody minds their own business, the seats are spacey (pretty sure people got away with having sex or doing some other stuff with the amount of space you have with the seats) and the train provides free wi-fi.  I have to say that you’ll be seeing the 2nd best scenery while you’re relaxing on your ride since the train goes through rural country like routes and then into Boston.  You’re good to go.

1. The Green Line – Fake Life.  Am I right?  I don’t even need to go into explanation about how legit it is being on this line.  B,C,D,E Green Line trains will take you to all the hot spots, clubs, bars, restaurants, Fenway Park, ect and ect.  Along the way you pass by the 3 colleges of BC, BU, and NU which always has something popping off and there’s eye candy for everyone.  I know I’m missing mentioning some things but you guys already know the deal.

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Geordie Shore…The Show That Will Tickle You In A Weird Way

Ladies and Gents I present to you the hilarious cast of Geordie Shore.  This show is the UK’s version of Jersey Shore which you probably didn’t need me telling you thought but thought I just toss it in there just in case. I’ve been watching this show for about 2-3 weeks already and I must say that this show and its cast just destroys the originals that we’ve grown to love, enjoy – hate and gotten sick of. (Is it weird that I’m watching a show like this from another country and blogging about it?  Like if this stops me from getting laid here in American then I should just move to the UK and smash it up, right?) Now I’m going to give you a quick run down of Geordie crew as they appear in the video so you’ll have a sense of what I’m talking about after you’re done getting familiar with them.

Jay = Ronnie but without the whole crying thing and being soft.  Dude looks like a damn action figure but moves like he has the legs of gumby.  Still I have no beef with him and he’s a pretty chill lad.

Vicky = I want to say she equals Sam but that would be a huge insult to Vicky so what I will say is she has a relationship with Jay that resembles Ron’s and Sam’s.  This chick is a legit G with it, she’s “That Chick”.  When she gets mad she knows exactly what the fuck to say and how to storm out.  Her angry face is pure sexy and it puts some warmth into my small cold heart.

Gary = Vinny?  Both of them have the same mindset when it comes to dating and trying to pick up smokeshows when they head out to party and do it up.  Now who is funnier between the two of them?  I’d gotta give it to Gary but Vin awkward funny.  Also Gary has some ridiculous swag game from what they show of him so I’m just going to give him some cred for that.  I forgot to add that this dude has one of his female roommates on check when it comes time to go to smash city.

Charlotte = No one I guess.  She does have some kind of relationship with Gary but it’s mostly just being his smash rag doll during the boring nights of the house.  She pulled  Snooki and started to have feelings for him but Gar hasn’t made his mind up yet if he wants her as his girl or not.  I think Charlotte has to be the prettiest and funniest of the females in the house.  She’s one of those girls that will fit in with your friends and watch the game with you later on….mhmm perfect.

James = Pauly D….kinda.  James must have a life supply of v neck tees.  In every episode I’ve seen so far this dude has a v neck in every color, pattern, and material.  ( Does Pauly D rock the v necks?  I can’t remember if I seen him with some of them on or not?)  James isn’t funny or clever like Pauly, so that’s the only downside I guess.

Sophie = My eyes burn when ever she tries to get her sexy on.  I don’t like when they put the camera on this girl, she’s too loud and reminds me of a cross-breed between Ms Potato Head and a penguin.

Gary = “That Dude”.  The Situation wouldn’t be able to compete in swaggerness  with That Dude aka Gary.  He cooks better, more chill and laid back.  Gary doesn’t care about going to gym and much rather drink and play his X-Box 360 instead.  ( Man crush….I disappoint myself sometimes.)  Average guy, mastermind and everybody tends to like him.

Holly = Snookie season 1 in the first two episodes.  This broad loves showing her boobs and kissing other dudes even though she has a boy back home.  Later on in a couple of episodes she ends up going home since she feels like she doesn’t fit in with everybody at the house and she’s just extra space.  She basically ends up leaving and going home and nobody notices till the next morning….how salted did this broad feel when she ended up watching this later on?  Shame, shame, shamee.  She needs a No Mas card for that situation.

Alright there you go, a rundown of everybody if you decided to watch the show and see if you give a fuck about it or not.  I’d say watch it if you don’t have anything to do or if the Sox aren’t playing.  Hopefully you enjoy and become hook so I can have more people to talk about it with when I’m drunk.  Till next I bid you a goodbye, god bless and stay safe.Geordie Shore

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I Need This Shirt And I Want It Within 2-4 Days!

Just way too much swag in that shirt for me not to have it.  I’m living in Pittsburgh right now till the end of the summer and while I’m out here doing my thing and waiting for time to depart from these squidish people I could use this shirt to rub in their faces of how superior Boston’s sports teams are to their teams and the rest of America’s teams.  All I need is a black fitted cap and this shirt and I’m good to go to go and be that masshole in shittsburgh…..however there is a problem in my plan.  Barstool is selling this shirt for $25 which is a reasonable cheap price and I don’t have a problem with it at all.  Then I notice there was a s&h fee that cost an extra $4 which blew my mind so I had to say No Mas and close my wallet.  El Pres is trying to pull a A&F scam on me, what’s the deal with that?

And then boom! I present you a sick style Lord Stanley Cup shirt with all the names of the Bruins players listed on the cup.  Clever idea isn’t it?  This shirt cost about $15 I think or I hope it does and there’s no s&h fee to it.  Well there we go and what up to that.  (Yes I know and I understand that I’m a cheapass. Tough times, folks.)  Now if anybody is interested in checking out this shirt then head on over to the  http://www.thenosebleeds.com/p/store.html and see what’s good, then browse the site after and enjoy.  Couple good ol Boston Boys/Massholes talking about sports and trying to make a living like the rest of us blogger aka me being a fake blogger cause I’m too lazy to put effort into it.  Anyways I got off topic once again but yea this is today’s useless and random blog of the day.  Much love and stay safe.

P.S. Someone email Pres and tell him to let me be an intern at the Stool, thanks to all.

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Bruins Win The Stanley Cup And Boston Is Title Town…Bow Down

3 Pats Superbowl Championships, 2 Red Sox World Series Titles, 1 Celtics NBA Finals Championships and Finally The Boston Bruins With Their NHL Win Over The Canucks are the new Champions of the NHL and Owners Of Lord Stanley Cups.  Beautiful isn’t it?

It finally happen ladies and gents, our boys the Boston Bruins are back on top once again.  Lord Stanley Cup has return home and the rest of America is back to hating us….surprise?  Course not, it was bound to happen sooner much rather than later and was worth the wait.  I’m not going to do too much blogging about last night and the events that went on and all of the stuff today too.

Barstool Sports Boston has been blogging the shit out of the Bruins win and been posting a mayhem of pictures the whole day so you’re basically covered with all the info you need there.  Plus right now I’m just getting back into blogging mode so bear with me here if these blogs sound like fucking Manzo’s blog. I’ll get my swag back and push out grammar flawed ridden blogs with nonsense and what fuck confusion you’re all use to from the past so enjoy the re ride of this blog once again.

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Well, Thats About It. Final Blog And Many Thanks On In This Blog. Later

Well that’s it folks, I’m done.  Its been a good 5 months of blogging but I think I had enough and all you fuckers had enough of it as well.  Work hasn’t left me time to blog and come up with good ideas so I just been slacking with it lately and mostly been posting horrible blogs or whatever I felt would be a good filler but no more of that.  No Mas I say!  Now I need to focus on the new fake promotion that I was awarded at work….training 3 new employees at work that don’t know how to speak english how to work the computer and put in web orders.  I’m not even getting a pay raise for that but eh, what ever.  The question that everybody wanted to know about this site I’m going to answer right now.  Did creating this blog get me laid?  Fuck no!  Did it get me famous?  Only in my dreams.  Do girls that read this blog and see me in the bar while their drunk show me their boobs?  Not yet but it should happen soon.  Anyways, thank you to those who read the blog and enjoyed it, but now I’m done blogging and time to shut the Thought factory down.  Before I finish I like to say a couple thank you’s to friends and others that have contribute to the blog and helped out.

Juan Santiago, for bringing is purtorican tokeness to the blog and being my first co blogger to join.

To all the Romeo & Juliet’s that allowed me to type of a good bio and description of them.  You brought many boners and lady boners of HLT readers.  Truly a great job.

Chad Warren Watts, did a kick ass job with all the sports blogs.  God knows I’m too lazy to get my sports blow swag on so Mr Watts got his beast mode on.

The hidden broad that sent in those awesome titty pictures, still don’t know who you are but thank you.

My lovely snow bunnies that got sexy with it.  You kept the creepy guys warming during the cold winter months.  Turned them into man-child instead of being a child, so thank you.  And all of the snow bunnies can get it.

All the reader that left comments on blogs that they read and liked.  Thank you for taking time.

BJH for pushing people the limit and seeing how far they can take it…..wasn’t very long that people could take it.  Soft skin people ey?

And finally I can’t for get this thank you.  Too everybody that has ever called me an asshole, douche, tool, and every other name out there.  I gladly accepted all those names and actually turned all those things into a good thing.  I maybe hollow on the inside but I say what needs to be done while you just sit back and get angry.  Shake your heads, shake them well.  I’d take an honest bad guy over a hypocrite anytime.

Well for the last time I’ll be saying this here – God bless, have a good weekend and stay safe.  Wish you all the best luck and continue to do what you do.

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Couples Things I Need To Do And Things I Know I Won’t Do/Finish

Nice weather out and I have a day off today so I was able to catch up with some things and also get some thinking done.  You know the deal, try to use the time wisely and get the best of it and that is what I did.  Actually not really, most of the time I just sat around and thought things up that some make sense and the rest of the thoughts just sounds like it comes from a derange mental person, which could also be me.

Things I Need To Do Or At Least Attempt –

Hookup with some girls from the hometown.  Been meaning to try and do this for a while but too much planning and know what targets maybe open for the idea.  Yea I said it and I see nothing wrong with it, call me a creep.  Don’t worry its fine, I don’t mind.

BBQ at 2am on a rooftop or in a nice backyard.

Play in the WSOBP = World Series Of Beer Pong so I can finally get the beruit out of my system.  It’s about the time I should start to let it go.

Swim, 22yrs old going on 23 and I still can’t have fun in the shallow end of the pool.  How am I suppose to bang a hot girl in the pool if I can’t make my way over there?

Get it in with a Milf/Cougar or a teacher….23-40 age range but must be hot and I won’t go for that leather skin.

Get myself on the Wall Of Fame at any restaurant that has a food challenge.  I’m always hungry and I don’t know why but I have a feeling I would do it up.

Attend a wet t-shirt contest or hold a wet t-shirt contest.

Whipped cream bikini…..one day, hopefully one day when I get off a long shift from work there will be a hot girl waiting for me in this.

Get head while smoking a cigar or drinking beer….don’t judge me because this is normal.

Get on reality tv and at least make it to the final 5 in what ever reality show I am on.  You fuckers better vote for me but knowing most you will vote for the fuckers will support the other competitors.  You know this is true of what I speak.

Attending Burning Man and SxSw and just do it up.

Ride a bike to a party with beer in my backpack.

Spend the whole night in the city and watch the sun rise.

Get more girls to join the White Girl Army.  Stop thinking you’re too good to join, girls.  Listen I know a handful of you girls that have that slut mode in you and have things that you just like to laugh off so the WGA is a lot less slutty so hurry up and get in.

Things I Don’t Want To Do, Don’t Care For Or Too Late To Do –

Watching girls kiss or have sex…eh just seems like a waste of time.  I’m good with my NFL replays.

Go camping. Why not Josh?  Cause its not fucking fun at all, no need to get intouch with nature and I have youtube for that or I can look out my window and see the wildreness where the high school kids go to smoke and do weird shit so no thanks.

Travel to different countries.  No good can come of it, people won’t understand me or like me.  I wouldn’t fair well against any country’s judicial system and I know the U.S. government knows that I hold no value to waste their time on to help me.

Eat liver, ducks, or any other thing that shouldn’t be in my stomach.

Be in the friendzone with a girl.  Nope, not having it, much rather be no friends than act like a lapdog or get “aww cute”thing.  Call me selfish or stupid but that’s how I feel.

Golf?  No need to watch it, not relaxing at all and is a frustrating sport to play.

Hookup with girls I had the chance to but didn’t for weird reasons.

Taken the one job that was offered to me to basically do nothing at all and get paid a shitload.  What shame I put on the Jones name.

Threats that people think that are supposed to be scary and make me change my ways.  I think I’ve had almost every threat thrown at me before.  Why is that I don’t know why…..

Done for now but I’ll add to the list probably.

P.S. Fat people in motorized wheelchairs because…well…they got themselves too fucking fat to walk and only getting fatter by not getting up from the moving fat machine.  Useless.

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There’s Hope For Me After All. Thanks Jay Cutler and Not So Much Kristen Cavallari

Yahoo -“Eight months after they started dating, Jay Cutler(notes) and reality TV personality Kristin Cavallari are engaged to be married. People.com reports that the Chicago Bears quarterback proposed to the former star of “Laguna Beach” and “The Hills” during a weekend trip to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. The ring is reportedly 5.2 carats.”

Average looking, hated by many, not respected….but what does all of that really mean, ladies and gentleman?  HOPE, well somewhat of hope left for me.  If Jay Cutler was able to snatch this little minx than I guess this must be a sign for me, right?  Besides the fact that I’m not a professional athlete and nor do I have millions of dollars sitting around.  Oh yea I forgot to add that I will never be able to buy a 5.2 carat wing for my snow-white but over looking all that I see there is hope for to snag a reality tv star like Ms – Mrs? Cavallari….by the way I think trying to label her a “reality” tv star is kind of stretching it.  You know everything that came out of her mouth was scripted and sent to her phone so she could remember what to say.  My fake girlfriend’s reality is more real than this broad.  However for Jay Cutler I have to congratulate him for being the biggest asshole in the NFC and still coming out on top and being a good role model.  I now know what I have to do in life to get myself a hot girl like that.  Just continue to be above average looking, stay hated by man and loved by some, and I will win at the end.  Sounds good enough? She Can Get It but I’m to scared to Wife her up.

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